3DS XL: Larger Machines > Games

This week’s comic is orbiting bitterly around Nintendo’s 3DSXL announcement, as Guesty envisions a future where we all simply play larger versions of the same consoles. It’s horrific. Can you imagine a bigger original sized PS3. You could kill a man with it. Anyway, click to read nothing useful about Ninty’s newest. It’s BIGGER THAN YOUR HEAD.

Max Payne 3: Review

Our Max Payne 3 review looms ardently into the bullet and alcohol-splintered centre stage as Rob sits down with Rockstar’s third entry into this legendary series to have a good, hard chat with it. In slow motion too. He’s still there. It’s going on forever. Get inside and find out what we thought of Max’s Brazilian excursion!

Angry Birds Space: The Movie. The Comic.

Avid Angry Birds fanatic Mark Guest has been wildly tapping his iPhone screen of late, and as such, has decided to pitch yet another Angry Birds: The Movie idea. This time he’s branching out with his take on the wacky SPACE spin off. Which by the way, is excellent. Play it. Play it now. Go on, we can wait…

Sony Keynote Review: E3 2012

At a truly hideous hour in the morning, we sat and watched Sony talk at us LIVE. Following on from Microsoft’s earlier effort, what does the Playstation 3 have in store for us this year, and next? The rumblings of next generation reveals now seem unlikely, but there’s plenty to catch up with for Sony this evening! How did they fare? Find out amongst the illiterate spieling!

Hitman Absolution: Sniper Challenge Preview Video

It’s video time AGAIN, as we show off Rob’s appalling sniper skills and his breathtaking ability to somehow miss an integral mechanic of the game and make the first few minutes of the video utterly redundant! We take a look at the downloadable preorder bonus for Hitman Absolution, which comes in the salacious form of a Sniper Challenge mission. Old baldy’s back. Are YOU getting it?

Max Payne 3 Special Edition Unboxing

We tear open the special edition of the latest Max Payne, and splurge its guts all over Rob’s living room floor! Full video unboxing complete with an unfit-for-camera voice over and a little scrawling in the glorious name of video game STATUES.

Mass Effect 3: Review

FINALLY, we finished it. And finally we’ve managed to pen something that bares some sort of familiar reference to a fully-fledged, unabashed REVIEW. And what’s more, we’ve done it with NO SPOILERS. Yep, they’re coming later, when we take a closer look at that chin-waggery ending, but for now, dive right into our misty eyed reminisce of the time we poured into ME3 and find out if YOU should play it! Wop!

iOS Controller Could Change Everything. Again.

Latest Apple rumour gets Rob all prospective as we take a look at what the latest addition to the endless accessory mountain could be, and how it could change the portable gaming plane FOREVER.

Recap in…5: Episode Two

Remember that thing we did once called The Week in Games? YEP, IT’S NOT CALLED THAT ANYMORE. RECAP in…5 is here! Clever eh! Not at all really no, but we’re running with it so get used to it. Jump on in and have a gander at our latest garblings in excellent retina-curdling video form, and expect this to happen SLIGHTLY MORE FREQUENTLY from now on.

n.b: It’s the news, only brief, yet somehow not to the point and louder! Everyone’s a winner.

Respawn in..5 Podcast Episode 14!

It’s THAT time again, and yes it has been several millenia since we last SPOKE with our voices for you, but that’s because we’ve been very busy filing paperwork and what not. This, the first Respawn podcast of 2012, will definitely usher in a new age of regular podcasts that are even LESS COHERENT THAN USUAL! Take a dip into our reverberating vocal aquarium, excuse the Tangent Fish and settle in for inane rambling about 2011, the Vita, and this year’s E3! Plus SOME OTHER STUFF!

SOPA – A Fate Worse Than A Fate Worse Than Death

Rob blurts completely rational dissent in the direction of SOPA, after, of course explaining what it is and informatively informing the world about the greatest threat to mankind as we know it. Unfortunately Rob is about as far from political aptitude as it is possible to be, so excuse the glaring omissions and long tangents about horses. Now READ! Quick! Before we’re all censored to death. GO ON THEN.

Gotham City Impostors Beta Test Preview

It’s the goddamn Batman….’s friends. Guesty excitedly bounds into the caped crusader’s latest, and rather distanced new multiplayer-only first person shooter. Is it the next comic, cantering craze, or a clowning, corpsing, cavalcade. I’m aware there isn’t a particularly negative adjective there, and that corpsing doesn’t even seem vaguely relevant. All the more reason to get in there and READ GUESTY’S SCROBBLING. Noice.

The Year in Games 2011

HERE IT IS. In true Respawn style (i.e. several days late, and with a smattering of plot holes) we stumbled untowardly into 2012 by taking a suspicious doubletake back at the utter rollercoaster that was 2011, all the games, the ups, the downs, the hacks, the scandals, the feel-good victory stories, the good, the bad and the questionably worded. Everything you could want to know about the year in games is right here! They reccomend you take a deep breath before you click the jump. I don’t know why.

The Video Game Awards 2011

Respawn in…5 at the VGAs! And by ‘at the’ we mean, ‘make Rob stay up till 3am streaming it over the interwebs!’ And I’m even aware that makes no sense whatsoever. EXCELLENT HEY! Trawl through this intensive coverage of this rollercoaster event, featuring some Oh-mazing announcements, Charlie Sheen, Hideo Kojima and MORE. Now with HIGHLIGHT TRAILERS! Hoorah.

Batman: Arkham City Review

Once Guesty finally finished frothing at the mouth, we sat him in the office and beat some words out of him. The first were all pretty much indistinguishable gargles, then after a month or so he started actual words, but preceded every one with Holy- something or other. Eventually he strung a coherent sentence together and BANG. Here we are. Check out what we think of Rocksteady’s follow up to the stunning Arkham Asylum, have they kept a tight hold of that prestigious gaming crown, or has the Penguin gone an’ ‘ad it!? FIND OUT HERE AND SUCH.

Wireless Speed Wheel: Accessory Review

Rob has a RIGHT GO at the new wireless speed wheel, the latest accessory to cause onlookers to audibley scoff, and then mutter something anti sematic. Is it really the perfect Forza companion? Or an overpriced piece of plastic pretension that belongs in the barrell of bizarre Wii add-on cast offs? YOU decide! Actually we’re going to tell you.

OnLive: Video Unboxing & Playtest!

WATCH and read our playtest of newly launched cloud gaming system OnLive. Stand in awe as Rob tears the box to pieces, then tears the system itself to pieces, and finally tears his own mind to pieces. Is OnLive the future of gaming? Is it the past of gaming? Should Rob stop making videos and just leave us all alone!?! FIND OUT INSIDE!!

Infinity Field Review

Infinity Field’s our latest iOS review, but can the Geometry Wars clone do what the masters of the genre couldn’t and take a classic on the road? Is this 69p well spent, or just a brash, unashamed bucket of dross that a Bizarre Creations cast-off happens to have been sick into? FIND OUT INSIDE! Probably.

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