If you’re venturing off in the vague direction of the UK’s most prestigious gaming soiree next week; and as the well-read, intelligent and all together delectable readers of Respawn that you are, why wouldn’t you be, there’s every chance you’ll be stumbling around in a bind panic, jamming needless accessories like kitchen appliances into a bag the size of your thumbnail and trying to sew together the curtains in a sweeping act of madness, but fear not brave and noble Consumer Trade Show Goer! Respawn in 5 is, of course, here to help! Here are our top tips to getting around everything you want to see at this year’s salacious looking Eurogamer Expo!
Packing things is great fun, which is what we told our wife last week when we turfed her out (ha – wife) however pack lightly. Like the butter. You’re probably going to have to carry that bag around all day, and after about an hour, those straps start to really gnaw away at your shoulder bone. Trust us. Leave anything unimportant and remember that disposable items are your friend, because like friends, once you’ve pathologically squeezed any personal gain you may reap from knowing them out, you can discard them like the rubbish they are. We don’t have many friends, but we reckon that sentiment is probably about right.
I don’t care where your home is, if it’s not on the doorstep of Earls Court, you better wake up early sunshine. You’re going to London, a wretched hive of scum and villainy populated by insufferable cads that I persistently claim I wish to live around. Because I do. Honestly. Someone buy me a London flat please. Anyway; traffic is bad, and trains can be jam packed full at any time of the day, so make sure you’re out of bed as quick as a flash!
Johnson! What Can You Make of This?
Plan! Planning is the key to all success in life. You heard it from these revered and celebrated philanthropists first, remember. There’s a list of things you’ll want to be checking out on the expo website, as well as the map you’ll receive as you perforate the hall’s extremities. Try to list a top three or five, and remember, when you break in there early, the queues will be quieter!
And it’s not just games you’ve got to consider – Eurogamer plays host to a smattering of teeth chatteringly interesting Developer Sessions (the man, the legend; Hideo Kojima’s dropping in this year, go say hi!), days and times for which you may again, find on the website or in your guide. Know which ones you’re interested in, and queue early by the appropriate door, because missing out isn’t fun for anybody. Even Guesty. Sadly.
Stalls, Shops and Food!
Eurogamer is made even better by the sprinkling of stores they entertain, generally found lurking by the exit. Insert Coin Tees are making an appearance at this year’s shindig, and blast your eyes if you don’t go have yourself a butchers at their fine wares and a chinwag with the friendly folk behind all the magic. Honestly, they put out some flipping fantastic gaming shirts and hoodies, so make sure you don’t miss out!
Queues for food get utterly hideous at the obvious times so try to plan your hunger-clock to ring at off-peak times, if you see what I’m driving at there.
And finally, converse. People who go to conventions and consumer shows such as Eurogamer are as fanatical about these glorious achievements as you are, and many relish such topical conversation, even if they don’t necessarily agree with your incomparably well-informed opinion. So don’t be afraid to ask strangers what they thought of their most recent playtest, accost the stand attendees with enquiries and inane chitchat, and generally cause mischief wherever you go. That’s what we did last year anyway, and we were only asked to leave five or six times!
If you are indeed heading to Earls Court next week, come and find us, we’ll be around somewhere arguing with security and insisting it was all just a misunderstanding! We’re there every day, and you can keep up with all the ramblings on Rob’s Twitter!
See you at the show!